The Difference Between Raising My First Born And Second Born….

….is that with my first born I was ultra careful about everything! and I mean EVERYTHING!

From ensuring that her baby clothes were handwashed till the age of two to panicking everytime she sneezed to not allowing her a gadget or watch TV till she turned four to giving her junk food only after she turned 5…you get the drift eh? I was this ultra careful mother…I remember once she slipped from our hands when she was about 11 months and with one tooth just sprouting out, it cut her mouth with some blood flowing out. While my MIL told us there was nothing to worry, RD and I rushed her to the hospital (drama really!) till the doctor looked at us and said it is just a small cut which has already sealed (facepalm moment!)

On the other hand, the younger brat has managed to pour blood all over the cupboards by cutting her hand and the blood flow wouldn’t stop! R got so bugged at my sheer coolness about it saying ‘Amma she will lose all her blood and become a bloodless R2’ I told her not to worry too much! The more bugging part seemed to be cleaning up all the blood marks she had put on the white cupboards! (for those who are worried, R managed to keep holding the kerchief over R2’s squirmy tiny fingers till the blood flow stopped completely) 

Or when I take her for a plaything and just let her slide down a slide which is as tall as me 🙂 The teacher told me that she thought I had a lot of confidence in my brat’s sliding abilities 🙂

Or the fact that I give her whatever we eat. Including pizzas and chips. The only thing I think I have not let her have is aerated drinks but that too because we dont drink it anyways!

Or the fact that she watches TV whenever R watches..I dont stop her!

Or when R2 has cold and cough or loose motions. I am so much more calm and relaxed…its like I know I should worry too much until a certain point..

Is this confidence in myself or is that by the second child is born, I realised that panicking is not taking me anywhere?

My friend N who had her kids nearly two years apart met me with her family when I was pregnant with R2. I had warned R before meeting her, warning R not to ask for any juices since N’s daughter R was really small and of an impressionable age. When we met, N asked R if she wanted juice. A sudden hushed silence fell on the table as if she had spoken the name of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. R looked at me in horror while RD smirked. The little darling daughter of N started saying ‘juice juice’ N looked at me perplexed. BUT BUT I started…N being N the practical friend said ‘ Oh she drinks all juices..can’t give it to the older one and not give it to the younger one, eh? She then went on to tell me how the second born usually gets things so much faster.

And she is so right! R2 gets stuff a lot earlier than R 🙂

So parents to two or more kids….does the same hold true in your house?

We should be in the shelf..not the patrams! Amma does not understand that!

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About R's Mom

Not-so-new-mom
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6 Responses to  The Difference Between Raising My First Born And Second Born….

  1. Lata Sunil says:

    Yes.. yes.. Now I find it funny seeing single parents panic and trivial colds and fever. Even teaching the younger one is so much more relaxed. I am not worried if he has exams or tests. They survive and a few marks here or there doesn’t matter. Being a parent the second time is more joyful that way.

  2. If it was not illegal here, i would have let the twins raise themselves. I will anyway need 4 extra set of eyes to keep track of what they are doing. With the first born, it was totally different.

  3. Jo says:

    Hi RM.. Good to see you back.. Caught up with Tas posts today. Glad to know that you are having a good time there. When I resigned my job and moved to US with hubby, I also had all these negative feelings and didn’t want to stay to home all the time. But then, due to the Visa status, I had no option to work. Hope you can find a job soon. I keep myself engaged with something or the other always to shoo away those negative feelings. Thanks to the YouTube tutorials on anything and everything, blogosphere, the few friends I have made here, library et all 🙂 Keep blogging. Have fun.

    • R's Mom says:

      Thanks Jo..honestly I cannot thank God enough for giving me such wonderful blog friends who have been so positive about everything 🙂 Hugs to you 🙂

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