Letter to My Daughters – Looks and All that Jazz

Dear R and R2,

When Amma was a teenager, Amma was very insecure about her self. Her pimples, her fatness, her looks, her lack of ability to perhaps not be good in everything as compared to her cousins and so much more. Now that I am much older, I find what my parents had told me is so true. In the long run, nothing matters.

Pimples turn to marks, fatness continues despites diets and crash diets and you just get comfortable in your skin.

Kids, remember that at the end of the day what matters is how much confidence you have in yourself.

I am not saying grooming is not important. But all am saying is that looks really dont define you. What matters at the end of the day is how good a human being you are.

Everyone has the same set of eyes, ears, nose n mouth. Its how you carry yourself that makes the difference. Of course, its easy for me to say all this at the ripe age of 33, but here are a few things I learnt over the years.

1. No matter what you wear, if you are not comfortable in it, you are never going to look good in it

2. Have confidence in yourself. Thats the best beauty secret

3. Maintain a beauty regime of at least washing your face twice a day. Dont be lazy like Amma!

4. I have noticed folks who wear kajal look pretty. Both you girls have lovely eyes. So get that kajal on 🙂

5. Dress in colours you love no matter what people say about skin tone and all that. Dont be stuck to blacks, greys and blues like Amma!

6. I would love to say dont use make up at all. But that would be wrong. Use it judiciously and sparingly. Remember subtle works better than garish!

7. Never get too influenced by the way others dress. Remember what suits them may not suit you!  Also try out all kind of clothes and accessories. Of course nothing to beat the comfort of a tee shirt n cotton pants but dont be like Amma. DRESS UP when the occasion demands it or you feel low in life!

8. Be prepared to get compared with each other since you are of the same gender. Your skin colour (the comparison has already started!), the lack of a dimple or the twinkle in the eye. Please dont mind these comparisons and be proud of your sibling.

9. Despite the six year age gap, I hope you reach a phase in life where you can exchange clothes. Thats like one of the best things of having a sibling of the same gender 🙂

10. Remember you cant change the way you look, but be confident of yourself and that makes a world of difference.

You must be wondering why Amma is writing so much about looks. Guess Amma just wants to pass on all her (un)learnings to you girls 🙂

One of the laziest dressers in the world


About R's Mom

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15 Responses to Letter to My Daughters – Looks and All that Jazz

  1. If ever I have a daughter I will ask her to read all of these letters!! Very well written again.

  2. RM, you should think about making a memory book for R and R2 out of these posts! 😀 I’m sure they’d love it.

    Annnd, yesss to kajal!

  3. Lovely, RM. 🙂 I wish someone had told me all this years ago… I was fat, pimply and ugly (in my own eyes) as a teenager too, and highly insecure of myself.

  4. aarya says:

    RM i just love all these letters you are writing for R and R2…no hi-fi gyaan, just practical stuff. 👍

  5. Scribby says:

    5,6,7 the best ones.. I loved them!

    thanks for writing this here, I keep telling Chirpy on and off, but now I can read these in one go to her 🙂 you mind me copying? 😉

  6. Srividhya says:

    Hi, If I were to advice my daughter, I would utter the same thing. Same thoughts keep running in my head every day. Good job!!!

  7. I super like this post. Feels very true…makeup but know the your limitations…
    By the way…wanted ur thots on my feeble attempt at letter to chutku. Was actually looking forward to ur comment there

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