Dear Payannur Thathi

I hope you are now with Thatha up there, talking the usual dime a dozen to him, and telling him what all he missed out during these years when he left you alone on earth and went away. And I am very sure you have taken over the task of making filter coffee for everyone out there in heaven no?

You are one of my favorite thathi. When Amma told me yesterday that you passed away, there is this sense of gloom that has come over me. I think I am upset in a weird way.

I see you as the thin frame short lady walking with a limp (thanks to the polio attack) but walking so fast that we all were left behind. You were the epitome of energy, thathi. From morning coffee to night dinner, you could do everything in a jiffy.

Your filter coffee is the BEST I have ever had. And you have been so so consistent in your taste. Whether you made it at your house or anyone else’s house, you got that awesome taste. How, thathi how?

And your bakshanams have been legendary. Before caterers started taking orders for cheer, Amma, tells me that you would make 100s and 100s of murukkus and ladoos for anyone who was getting married. You would be so fast and efficient in your work. Any occasion in the wide extended family, you would be there to help. You have visited more relatives than anyone I know, but everyone LOVED to have you around. Your helpful ways, your fun loving nature, your smile, your jokes..sigh!

Your moorkutaan was the awesomeest thing ever…with potato fry…and a dollop of ghee..yummmm! Anything you cooked was to perfection. Anything. Even parappu chadam was awesome Thathi.

And your enthusiasm for life was unbeatable. Honestly I have never seen you sad or upset or angry. Of course you would have been, but I have never seen you like that ever. Always smiling, joking, talking..you were a riot to be with.

And whenever I asked you how you were feeling, you would say not so good not so good, with a large grin on your face.

And thathi, your gardening skills were so awesome. Anything you touched flowered, fruited and bloomed. Amazing, how you could make those garlands without using a needle…the flowers were so perfectly arranged.

And the kolams you made. I remember you teaching Cousin K and Amma so so many small small awesome looking kolams. And for marriages and occasions you would start with a small dot and go upto making a 6 meter in diameter large kolam so effortlessly. And each time, it would be a different design. All from your imagination..what creativity Thathi..

And your singing. Sigh! you were so not in tune, but you made it up completely with your enthusiasm and fun…you could sing any song, join anyone and be absolutely delightful in your singing πŸ™‚

I miss you thathi. For some strange reason, the mind has been a bit upset since I heard about your death. I know you have lived your life, seen your great grand kids and are an example of someone who has literally lived life to the fullest and helped everyone who crossed you to the best of your abilities. If you came, people would heave a sigh of relief because they knew that you would handle whatever came your way with ease.

I will miss you thathi. For your smile, for your coffee, for all the yummy food you made for me and for everything you have been.

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About R's Mom

Not-so-new-mom
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22 Responses to Dear Payannur Thathi

  1. The Bride says:

    Your thathi sounds awesome. I understand why you’re upset, why wouldn’t you be?

  2. Maya says:

    The post transported me back to my paati, RM. RIP, Payannur Thathi!

  3. Sorry to hear about your loss RM…this is a lovely ode to your thathi… Hugs!

  4. Great soul! May she rest in peace. But by the description you put up rest doesn’t seem to appear in her dictionary. May God rub off some of her enthusiasm on us.

  5. You have a knack of converting those million emotions into words, so beautifully πŸ™‚
    No one can replace our grandparents in our lives and it is so tragic to lose them…hugs to you!!!
    May her soul rest in peace…

  6. Smita says:

    If she can read this she will be misty eyed!!! A heartfelt post I must say!!
    My condolence!!!

  7. mahabore says:

    Am sure your thathi is in a good place right now and is truly watching over you and wishing you well, more so after having read this post which probably was the best tribute I have ever read to a grandmother.

    RIP Payannur Thathi

  8. Bingo's Mom says:

    I can so relate to this post. My paternal grandma is exactly the same.
    May her soul rest in peace.

  9. HereandNow says:

    For some reason this read made me teary R’s Mom.

  10. Awww, she sounds like such a wonderful person. Reminded me of my Patti in Chennai.
    May she rest in peace!

  11. anisnest says:

    RIP Thathi.. how come all grandma’s sound the same? their unconditional love and affection is something that we have to learn from them..

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