About Sharing and Groundnuts

Okie, extremely kiddish post.you can stop reading NOW or if you want to continue, please dont laugh but I want this out of my system

So I have always been told since childhood to share share share…so much that my brother used to keep that one chocolate he got as a kid on his friend’s birthday in school and bring it home and give me half of it..yaa yaa..he is a saint *rolls eyes*

But in short, everything in our house always had to be shared…two chips, half each for four of us, three rasgullas, divided into 4 *equal* parts by Amma and eaten..you get the drift..and somehow, even if our parents refused, RMB and I always used to keep stuff for them, ask them if they wanted, listen to their yes or no, and only then eat..

Anyways, so I guess this habit is ingrained in me and so whenever I eat I always offer people around me, RD included..if there is one batata vada left, I ask RD if he wants to share half…the guy never refuses eh?

So, while on sharing, this is something I do even when I am at work…I usually take *hold your breath* 3-4 dabbas to work…breakfast, lunch, something like mamara or khakhra to munch in the evening at about 4ish..WHAT? I am a hungry gal!

anyways, so while I eat at about 4ish, I usually offer to these guys who are in my team…

And one of them just takes away all my groundnuts 😦 I usually make ekdum yummy mamara with groundnuts in it..and for the past couple of months, I have observed that if I take like 25 groundnuts he takes away about 18 of them 😦

I love groundnuts…

So I decided to increase the quantity of groundnuts, so much so that now my mamara looks like an equal  mix of groundnuts and mamara and now, if I am taking 40 ground nuts he is taking away about 29 of them 😦

Darn! I dont know how to tell him know or ask him to take lesser ground nuts and more mamara…

I dont mind sharing,but the issue is I just take enough for just more than 1 person taking into consideration that if you offer to someone they will just take a spoonful or two…but this guy 😦

Well, you may suggest that I should stop offering, but thats so rude right? I mean here I am giving them for the past 5 months and suddenly if I stop and just keep munching kurumkurumkarummarum all by myself that would me rude na 😦

One crazy day, I thought of going to the washroom and eatingΒ  my evening ka dabba but sanity prevailed thankfully!

Life, I tell you, gives such challenges what to say 😦

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About R's Mom

Not-so-new-mom
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92 Responses to About Sharing and Groundnuts

  1. Jay says:

    Oh come, R’s mom! That guy is being inconsiderate. Not you.

  2. Jay says:

    Missed the ‘on’ there.

  3. Zephyr says:

    Of course you can’t go kurumkurumkarummarum all by yourself. That is rude. But did you think of joking with the guy to go easy on the peanuts so that you’d have some for yourself too? He might just laugh it off for all you know and take less from the next day? Sometimes humour helps in such situations.

    The sharing thing prevails in our house too and the L&M ‘shares’ too, but tries to cheat me 😦 I have to be on my guard forever with him when he does the sharing πŸ˜€

  4. pixie says:

    {{{{{{hugs}}}}}
    I can understand your dilemma!!
    and I’m still laughing to say anything sensible!!!!!!! :mrgreen:

    πŸ˜†

  5. Hmmm..I have an idea..how about you making some really bakwaas mamra-groundnuts for three four days and offering him ..have just a little bit yourself and snack on a banana/an apple instead for those three four days. I am sure he’ll begin to say no if he doesn’t like it, hehehe ;-)..and then you can start making your regular yummy mamra-groundnuts πŸ˜‰

  6. I am laughing like anything after reading this post of yours RM, you are adorable πŸ™‚
    May be you can try taking only groundnuts in seperate small dabba for you? you can keep that dabba with you only & share the other dabba with Mamra and few groundnuts with everyone? Sorry little bit more work for you to do but atleast you can eat what you like πŸ™‚ just suggestion.
    btw.. I also pack 3 dabbas for myself apart from biscuits, lollies, candies that are already in my drawer, you never know what you will feel like eating lol

  7. raji says:

    aw, you are so cute. One day a serious post on old age living and other day a post like this.

  8. My Era says:

    Same pinch on sharing (or atleast offering, if the other person refuses that’s their wish) before eating anything habit πŸ˜€
    The easiest way to check the man is prepare mamra w/o groundnuts for a week. That’ll tempt him to taste the mamra and get a hang of those. Then slowly start adding them off and on so that he loses the habit of picking the groundnuts out.
    As far fulfilling your fetish for groundnuts, eat them as snacks at other times.
    The bottom-line is take ground nuts out of the mamara and see if it affects the situation πŸ˜‰

  9. LOL
    The way you have written this post made me laugh, but it is a serious issue actually, I feel. I have faced this many times at office. I usually take snacks to office too in case I get hungry at 4 PM, and people have snatched away almost 80% of it. The same goes for lunch. A lot of people do not understand that the other person needs to eat too, or that they should bring their own dabba!

    This guy only seems to be eating the groundnuts, though, and not snatching your entire box. πŸ˜‰ Maybe you could take a little portion of the groundnuts for yourself first and then offer the box to the rest of the team? That works? That is what I started doing at office too.

  10. chaitalichari says:

    Well i must admit we didn’t hv this habit of sharing at my mum’s plc.. but it wasn’t a problem anytime.. but at my in laws we do have this habit of sharing and i quite appreciate it:)
    I remembered my days at office when we had this guy who would just take away the big piece or just gobble whatever we got but would never bother to get anything to eat or have a courtesy to share what others got. We used get pissed off with him, so we decided we won’t allow the tiffin to fall in his hands before others having their share.. so he would be the last guy to have it :).
    I would suggest u take ur share first and then pass it to others, it wouldn’t be rude and if dat guy has courtesy, he would know what he is doing is not rite thing.

  11. kashlife says:

    Hehehe πŸ™‚ …well β€œsharing is a good habit” but I am an exception when it comes sharing food at office. Since beginning, I take like one banana, one apple, one sandwich, 2 chapathis to office, so no sharing. Of course when we order food from outside, I would love to share. I just did not want to make it a habit. Sound selfish haan? πŸ™‚

    Anyhow in your case, I would take 2 mamara dabbas (with equal groundnuts in each of them), one for offering, and one for myself πŸ™‚

    BTW what is mamara???

    • R's Mom says:

      Well, its not selfish rey…it logically makes sense…at work, how much can you carry!

      WHAT..two dabbas..already I make mamra like twice a week, if I start carrying two dabbas, it will be crazy πŸ™‚

      Mamra is puffed rice, like kurmura in Marathi or mudi in Bengali..mamra is in Gujarati or Hindi I am not sure! Its used to make bhelpuri

  12. Lifesong says:

    Lol this is funny πŸ™‚ but the guy sure is irritating. The only thing that I can think of is take some groundnuts separately for yourself in another dabba πŸ™‚

  13. uma says:

    LOLOL…esp at the thought of taking the dabba to the washroom and eating it..lolol..
    I’d pretty much suggest what many others have: take two dabbas or take your share and then distribute. Actually, you can also say to the guy, “arrey, seems like you also share my love for the groundnuts more than the mamra..so may be you could leave a little more for me too???” *smile as much as you can while saying*….:-)))
    Good luck ;-))

  14. pavam man I tell you….trust me, he has a case of severe constipation!! πŸ˜₯ Why else would someone eat so many nuts every single day?? He must be thanking you and your groundnuts every evening, while in the bathroom for that effortless Visarjan :mrgreen:

  15. Swaram says:

    Can so relate with the sharing thing πŸ™‚
    I think u can just say it on a lighter note, like cracking a joke or something πŸ˜› I use that weapon many times πŸ˜‰ Like err may be say ‘Hey Mamara is crying that u are only choosing the groundnuts man’ or something like that πŸ˜› πŸ˜› Ya, I can be very very silly πŸ˜‰

  16. Sreetama says:

    Awww! Hugs RM! Wish you many many groundnuts in your yummy mamra! I know it would be rude to not offer your snack to that person, that too suddenly! You may put across your points in jest so that he gets the point, yet it doesn’t sound rude. Or or or… you can try what Joey did, pack a separate dabba only of groundnuts n say, “And this groundnut dabba is for the table!”

    P.S: Having your snack in the washroom is a complete er!!! πŸ˜€

  17. Amit says:

    Ok. Here is the solution. Seperate out the groundnuts on your on first and keep them in a separate bag. Then offer this guy. After he is done eating, take out your bag and add groundnuts to the remining stuff in front of him.
    If he asks about them, tell him that you are not well and have mixed your medicine in it and thus kept it seperate. Tell him that if he eats this, he will stay in the loo for the rest of the day. πŸ˜›

  18. Smita says:

    And jai ho devi ma of sharing! Aap mahan ho!

    Tell him jestfully, ‘tu to meri saari moongfali le jata hai’ or ‘too much groundnut increases weight kam khao’ or try ‘ thodi mere liye bhi chod de’! Had I been in your place I would have used the last one. But yes all in such a manner that it lookslike a joke and kaam bhi ho jai πŸ˜‰

  19. Ramya says:

    know what.. i’ve been in a very upset mood from morning today and u made me smile a bit πŸ™‚ thanks RM… u r lovely

  20. He’s definitely being inconsiderate RM. It’s a tricky situation…I mean, sharing is nice but if someone’s going to take advantage of that, I’d say stop sharing! I have healthy snacks in my drawer at work including nuts and crackers and I do offer my colleague who will take some sometimes but not all the time. So it works. If it was someone who hogged most of mine, I’d probably say no.

    Another option is doing what Joey does in FRIENDS. He doesn’t like sharing food and when his date took a chip from his dish, he ordered a whole extra plate of hot chips the next time around for her. πŸ˜›

  21. ashreyamom says:

    hmmm.. RM just take one more dabba just with ground nuts and add it to urs after the fellow leaves.. or just hand him the dabba with groundnut and say dont dont touch mine.. πŸ™‚

  22. Nameeta says:

    Oh!! That’s bad.. Even I have been at the receiving end once.. And that too when I was expecting (with twins), I would be constantly hungry.. I would take around 4 – 5 dabbas with snacks.. And this colleague of mine would never hesitate to take most part of it.. My hubby suggested – take your dabba to the coffee corner, sit with a cup of coffee, eat it and then return to your desk.. I was saved from my hunger pangs..
    You know, maybe you should joke about it and yet get the message across.. How long can you take this?!

  23. In my house, we are all groundnut fans…..when mummy makes a dabba of mamra, the groundnuts are all picked and eaten in one day…..then we all slowly finish the mamra left without a single groundnut in it, and patiently wait for the next batch :P. Dad started this trend, my sister n I followed.

    Now guess what? My 2-year old loves nuts, and ofcourse groundnuts. So when I am sitting down with my bowl of mamra, she happily comes and picks all the singdana, and I happily oblige thinking about all the protein+fat she is eating…..but I do feel robbed, if u know what I mean ;). What goes around comes around :).

    Sorry did not offer a solution to your issue but felt like sharing mine πŸ˜‰

  24. meenamenon says:

    Jus tell him straight n loud on his face to stay off! V simple actually – “Oye XXX(whateva his name is) from tomo u get only 5 groundnuts”! Simple rt?

  25. Mathangi Vijay says:

    Hey you know it is such a cute post! I seriously love reading your blogs for this attitude of yours. I mean see this is also such a big problem na, I wont call it trivial. But when we tell this to anyone, they’ll think we are kiddish. So wrong!
    Btw, I also had only these 2 things in my mind. Bring some separate groundnuts for you. After giving it to him mix it for yourself. Or take your share and then give it to others.
    Here in our office also we have a snack gang. But mostly it will be biscuits / fruits, so not much fight about it. But its such fun to share things and eat na.

  26. Nisha says:

    OMG, you’re so cute!!
    A friend of my brother use to spit in his food lest someone ate his tiffin when he was off for the assembly. Now, I’m not asking you to spit…Maybe just a few strands of hair! And pray he’s a hygiene freak πŸ˜€

  27. chipmunk2890 says:

    u take how much you want first and then share it! ultimate aim is to share what if it comes first or last girl. . and he a nerd or wat for a respect manner we gives! he really starving i belive, you just tell next time, wen u offer u wont guys feels hungry eh! you can bring some snack and we ll have a whole lot of thing to munch

    • R's Mom says:

      yep, guess thats right…I should just should take some first πŸ™‚

      • garima says:

        This situation happened with my tl..where other guy wud take all his sabzi..he told him ‘looks like my wife cooks for u’ and other day he said’ i know my wife cooks tasty food’btw y r u worried that u wud sound rude..when he doesnt care as to how rude it is took take away the nuts…then ofcourse u shud also stop thinking too much.in hindi it is called lai/murmure πŸ™‚

  28. metherebel says:

    I tell you what. Take another box to office today onwards! One with mamara minus groundnuts and another with mamara plus groundnuts. Offer the mamara from the first dabba to the peanut eater and keep the mamara from the second dabba to yourself! Simple πŸ™‚

  29. You love groundnut WOW excellent, Now that is good , I found someone who loves them, My office desk has a JAR full of them and I munch along every day , when everyone frowns upon me ..

    But it works out fine for me , I dont have to share it with anyone at all πŸ™‚ yayyyyyyyyyyyyy LUCKY ME ..

    Next time when he comes, Give him some money and say Go buy your own πŸ™‚ I bet that will stop him

  30. deepM says:

    Hello RM,

    Just checked all the comments nothing has left to say for me but i agree with chipmunk2890. You can take how much you want and then share it.

    One of my colleague’s mom makes awesome biryani. Whenever he brings biryani for a lunch everyone takes it and he left with literally “khali” dabba. since last few days whenever he brings biryani, he carries two dabbas one little big one for him and small one for the rest of our lunch gang but i think that fine right RM ? πŸ™‚

    Off topic: We got a cook and yesterday she cooked awesome dinner for us πŸ™‚ but honestly it feels really weird if you are cooking since long time. Hope i will be used with this change soon. πŸ™‚

    • R's Mom says:

      Smart chap….and your colleague’s mom is really large hearted…If I ever made biryani, I doubt I would share it with anyone πŸ™‚

      SUPER CONGRATS on the cook πŸ™‚

  31. Ritika says:

    I have a very similar love for Uncle Chips. And I do the same kuramkuram πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    I bought 10 big packets 2 days ago and now only one of the is left πŸ˜›

    • R's Mom says:

      You are seriously generous Ritika….I would never share uncle chips with ANYONE..but again, I doubt I will ever reach a stage in life where I will eat uncle chips without feeling guilty about the weight πŸ™‚

  32. awww…you are such a cute female. And over the share everything that you have part, I so identify with you… πŸ™‚
    and about saving the groundnuts…umm you eat first and then offer πŸ™‚ or instead of offering directly from the dabba take the groundnuts out in some bowl and then offer. That way, he can only take what is offered. πŸ˜€

  33. Jazz says:

    Such a nice habit you got RM, I usually am selfish and try not to share when I have my favorite snacks with colleagues. But with friends around, it is a different story. πŸ™‚

    • R's Mom says:

      but Jazz, its just that I feel a bit awkward to just eat by myself..and we have an open desk, so if I am eating, the other guy just has to get up and see what I am doing πŸ™‚

  34. Laila says:

    Me and my siblings were also brought up with similar values around sharing. And, I too faced such situations a number of times.
    Your post reminded me of this guy in my school who was always after what I got in my dabba. He wasn’t a bully or anything, nice guy, very protective of me… but, this whole dabba issue made me so annoyed that I even started skipping taking my dabba to school… now, when I think of it, it just makes me laugh… how kiddish it was…

    • R's Mom says:

      hai ma…I can so understand what you felt about the guy..its not kiddish at all..not when you are in school

      Chalo one thing is good, R will never face that problem in school, her mom cooks really bad πŸ™‚

  35. summerscript says:

    I liked the suggestions here RM. Let me know if it worked πŸ™‚ On the other side, what if the person sitting next to me brings all nice stuff but does not share. What shall I do?What to do? πŸ˜›

  36. techie2mom says:

    Used to happen to me also, i was on a diet so i used to take the pauva chevdo to office and my ex boss used to finish half of it!! Then i told him jokingly that i am on a diet and don’t eat anything from the canteen, hence i bring it from home, so if i feel hungry in the evening then, i’ll have to rush home early, which may affect the project deadline. He said, he didn’t realize and would keep this in mind!! He is actually very considerate and open person, so i didn’t face this issue again.
    Probably this guy too doesn’t realize what he is doing and may need to be told.
    and i didn’t find your post kiddish at all πŸ™‚

  37. Scribby says:

    you’ve got advises already from everyone around…one from my side *don’t know if this has been said above* as it is you are carrying 3-4 dabbas, so make pace for a small dabba and keep aside the mamra for offering in that one…and let anyone and everyone gorge on that and you keep your share in another dabba? sounds tedious or doable? πŸ™‚

    or else, for some day you might as well stop putting in groundnuts in mamra…see how he reacts to that and then jokingly you can say “you ate them all” πŸ˜‰ lol

    P.S. on sharing: we have been taught this too…so much that this is one of the strongest reasons I want another child πŸ˜‰ to teach Chirpy to share πŸ˜€

    • R's Mom says:

      yes yes..totally doable πŸ™‚ thats what I have done today πŸ˜‰

      LOL on the PS – your Chirpy is sweet enough to share even without a sibling..but again, you should have another kid eh?

  38. telugumom says:

    LOL!!!!!! I do not have any other ideas but this post did give me a good laugh πŸ™‚

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