My Dear Maya Aunty and Patel Uncle

Its been almost 8 years since you left us.. but somehow, you still manage to come in my dreams and some things just remind me of you.

You know aunty, I remember such silly things that if you were alive, you would have laughed at me..

like, how you used to make ekdum kadak puri ka dough and then ask me to make golas out of it when you used to come for Amma’s santoshi mata’s final pooja when ma fed 8 children from the village…or how you used to tell those kids in Gujarati to eat well because you have worked hard on making the puris and channa and kheer..

or you know that little bit of masala you added to your tea…you know aunty, I have never drunk better chai than yours..I swear..even Baa’s chai is not as good as  yours..when I told that to Baa one day after you were gone, she did say that my daughter used to make better chai 🙂

or remember aunty, how you used to make those perfect fulkas that would raise completely…with the right amount of ghee in it

Whenever, I go to Amma/Appa’s place, and I see amma’s ghee patram, I get reminded of all the ghee you used to send to our house because K&K didnt eat too much ghee but you knew we all loved ghee…It never occurred to you to buy low fat milk…you always bought rich milk, removed the malai and then made ghee only to give us a huge patram every month…

or the way you trained me to keep the kitchen platform clean when Patty had expired and I was at your house for 15 days…Amma always tells me that those 15 days is when I learnt how to keep a clean house 🙂

or aunty, remember that pattice you used to make with corn and left over rice…I never asked you for that recipe 😦

or the superb pizza sauce which you learnt from C masi in the US and then came and made pizzas for us…wow! those were amazing! I still make that sauce, the exact way you do, but somehow it never turns out that ways

Remember how before my class 12 chemistry practicals, you  had got  back some chemical samples for me from your school…and asked me to identify them…I got two of them in my actual practical exam…

or that horses cross stitch which you had done and uncle had hung over the dinning table…that picture often comes in my dream

You know aunty, most of the utensils and dabbas I have in my house are yours…funny how you kept aside just the right size for my kitchen…you didnt even tell me that you were planning to give them to me..

Aunty, I often remember the way you used to be always chic..whenever, whatever time we came to see you..the saree correctly pleated (I remember how you made Amma practice how to put on those pleats of the saree) the long hair tied in a single long braid right up the knee and the red bindi always on your forehead….you were so flawless that I often wondered if you ever were badly dressed ever..even at 10 in the night, if we dropped in unannounced, you would be perfectly dressed in the nightie…sometimes, I feel Ekta Kapoor borrowed her characters from you 🙂

or the daily 4 PM phone calls to Amma…you would always call, come rain, come sunshine and the way both of you would discuss school work of your respective schools or just general gossip 🙂

I remember aunty the weekends we used to stay overnight at your place…it was so much fun with RMB, K&K and you would let us do pillow fights 🙂

and what amazing stuff you had for us to eat at your place, mathiyas, fafdas, channa dal, biscuits, kharis..the perfect way you would make tea which we would put into the saucer and place the cup on the small plate next to it so that the dinning table didnt get spoilt…

I miss you aunty, in a lot of ways, I miss you…you lived all your life in Vile Parle and you were the one who taught us that if you need to ask for directions, ask the Paan wala…or the local tapri…

Such silly things I remember you for…

I am so sorry that RD never got a chance to meet you..otherwise he would have been a BIG fan…of you, of your cooking, of your practical ways in life…I know amma misses you all the time….I think of the the reason Amma/Appa decided to move away from Baroda was because both of you are not there anymore…

I am so sorry that you never will know that I have a daughter..who is as naughty as kids can be…I am sad that she wont know you, her life wont be as enriched as mine..she wont learn the right way to make rotis or the right way to clean the platform and leave things ready for the next day…I can teach her..but she wont learn that from you na…I feel bad that my child will never have interaction with a lady who was all about perfection and yet was my favorite aunt…

Uncle, its weird, I never call you by your first name, but always by your surname despite there being 100s and 1000s of Patels all over the world…and you would respond..

RD would have been your partner uncle in all the eating you have done…both of you would have hit off so well…he would have adored your frank way of speaking..the Gujjusised English you would speak and challenge anyone to prove you wrong

Appa used to narrate such wonderful tales of your intelligence to us right from IIT days to the company both of you worked together…

I recall you and Appa discussing new technologies and how your company could improve itself furiously and for hours together…

Remember that samosa and batata vada you got for us from ISCKON a week before you expired…I dont think I have ever gone back to eat batata vada and samosa from that ISKON in just hurts so much

and uncle remember how whenever we would go out to eat, only you and me would order channa masala and everyone would shout at us…heheeh 🙂 I can never have channa masala without thinking about you..and you would order specially because you knew I loved it 🙂

how you and Appa had totally conflicting views on so many things, but never fought 🙂

You know uncle I think it was so sweet of you not to come to the university when I studied there, because I refused to do Chem engg till you and Appa promised that you would never come in as external examiners when I was there…you never came…you would come and visit the profs there…but refused to take exams when I was in the batch because you considered me your daughter..I love that thing about  you…I dont think you ever differentiated between me and K..we always fought and argued when I grew a bit older, but you never made me feel that I was doing wrong…you let me voice my opinions..

I remember we all were down south on a trip when I got my class 12 results and I was insistent that I go to Pune to study BA in Ferguson college…you were the only one who supported me…of course, you did brain wash me into staying in Baroda later on..but the best thing I loved was, the instant support you gave me when I was bugged…

I got stuck during distillation column calculations in my final year project and  you told me to think out of the box and add a flash column instead of a distillation tower and my query was solved…

You always used to get us so  many crackers for Diwali, kites for Uttrayan, and take us to movies..I think I have seen more movies with you than even with RD or my parents…and do you remember how Holiday Inn had opened in Baroda and you took us all there because Appa was not around..and how Sunil Gavaskar was there and you encouraged us to go and take his autograph saying ‘ema shu che..jai aao’ and I did go

you used to always bring sweets or chips or something for us to eat when you came home

I remember that scooter of yours which started only when you kicked it and how you refused to own a car despite of Appa telling you so many times because you felt you had a chauffeur driven car in form of a rickshaw 🙂

I remember giving you wallets for your birthday but your money was always in your pant pocket..some in each of the four pockets and some in the shirt pocket..and when you took out money, you were so daag to the Gujarati who is supposed to be the most kanjoos after a marwadi…

you gave away money like water..literally!

I am sure you and RD would have hit off instantly 🙂

I am sorry that R didnt have the privilege of knowing you..of studying from you or even hearing you speak English 🙂 

It hurts me that R is deprived of such wonderful grandparents…I miss you both so much…for some weird reason, you have started coming in my dreams more frequently…I know somewhere up there, both of you are wondering how the hell this girl adjusted to the Mumbai routine 🙂


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64 Responses to My Dear Maya Aunty and Patel Uncle

  1. Jas says:

    And if they read this, they would be really happy and proud of you. 🙂

  2. I don’t have a comment for this post…because it left me all emotional and teary eyed 😥

  3. This is a beautiful beautiful memory. I really really undestand you. I have had such amazing neighbours when I was small and it hurts and aches so badly to think of them now, that house, that gate, the dog, the spectacles, the food….. Hugs !
    I know we must be hapy for having them in our lives but ironically it hurts so much to know that you just somehow can NEVER ever bring back even an iota of that memory into real life anymore. Or that they will be there to see your child grow and graduate. I think I will just read this again and again and cry and feel happy and end up missing such wodnerful days what we thought would stay on forever (even if not in the same way) all of a sudden became a memory.
    Huuuuuuugs to you RM.

  4. Such a beautiful, heartfelt post. My eyes welled up many times while reading this. It must have been wonderful to know these fantastic people.

    On a less serious note, I would have loved to know what all Maya aunty taught you about housekeeping during your fifteen-days stay at her place. Why don’t you share her tips in a separate post–i am sure some of us could benefit from it!!

    • R's Mom says:

      hahah! sure, will make a post and let you know for sure 🙂

      • Gayatri says:

        It would be great if you could include the pizza sauce recipe too. Glad you shared your memories of loved ones who have also become sweet memories for us. There’s so much to learn from our older generations!

        • R's Mom says:

          Sure, as a part of the Julia/Julie project, I can try it once and see…errr…its not too different okie..just that Aunty had magic hands 🙂 Will definitely put it up…how have you been doing..havent seen you around in a long time 🙂

  5. Awwww this is such a sweet post, RM. I am touched.
    Maya Aunty and Patel Uncle sound like such lovely people! Who were they, BTW?
    There is so much food in this post! 😀

    • R's Mom says:

      Patel Uncle was Appa’s class mate in IIT and Amma and Maya Aunty became friends because Appa n Uncle were friends..

      Aunty was a super duper good that everytime you ate her food, you would want more 🙂 and she used to watch these cookery shows and experiment things..and she would send across some to us whenever it was a success..

  6. Sujatha says:

    such a touching post RM !! my eyes are becoming moist now …

  7. Mathangi Vijay says:

    Hey feeling really touched by the post and the relationship you had with Uncle and Aunty. I am sure they are still watching you and are proud of you.. Its great to have such dear friends and neighbors.

  8. Chaitali says:

    Nice read!!
    You are blessed with wonderful set of people, to have memories like this, to treasure all through ur lifetime..

  9. Visha says:

    heartfelt…so so so heartfelt!

  10. ashreyamom says:

    oh… it is nice to remember such great people na.. we learn so much, we want o show them lot, but they are not there here on earth, but watching us from sky.

  11. Scribby says:

    ohhh RM…hugs lady ! Big tight ones… and lol @ ekta borrowed the characters 🙂
    don’t worry sweetie…Aunty is watching you and she knows about R…she is blessing R with all her love and is her guiding angel 🙂

    Loved ones when they part ways to not come back ever, leaves a hole inside our hearts…I know this feeling …but all we can do is remember them with a smile because they will not like if you cry remembering them,yeah?
    you are a brave girl RM…my sister…I’m proud of you !

    hugs yet again !

  12. meenamenon says:

    hey I kepp popping in here the first thing every weekday….. so mch do i love this space, but nvr got around to commenting.. my bad!

    But somthing abt this post touched me bad, possibly the uncle here reminded me of my daddy…… hearttouching!

  13. Nithvin says:

    Such a wonderful tribute to the two people you have cherished RM..I am sure their blessings will be with you always..

  14. Nithvin says:

    and hope it is ok to ask what happened to don’t have to reply to this if it is going to be difficult for you…

  15. greengables14 says:

    so lovely RM..their blessings and wonderful memories will always be there with you

  16. Sreetama says:

    A very heartwarming and touchy post. You are truly blessed with such wonderful people in your life. Hugs!

  17. Deepsu says:

    Hey RM.very emotive post…And especially few words “ven at 10 in the night, if we dropped in unannounced, you would be perfectly dressed ” dats really superb ……..U can rarely find such ladies…either we are tired after daily offc work routine or home chores…hats off to ur aunty for dis trait and we should surely ineherit this trait from her…

    Obviously our grandparents are realyyyyyyyyy superr duper cooks ……no doubts…

  18. ARP says:

    RM a great post!! Very touching, straight from the heart. Loved it.

  19. Take care, I wish god gives all of us such people in life so we can learn and be good as them .. maybe then our nation will become a good place

    I dont know what to say , I usually have a lot to shout about But…

  20. Ashwathy says:

    I know somewhere up there, both of you are wondering how the hell this girl adjusted to the Mumbai routine
    Yes they are. They are seeing it all from up above…and smiling. And sending their blessings.

  21. Smita says:

    No words to put here. Just a *hug*

  22. uma says:

    Such a heartfelt and heart rending post, RM. I wanted to comment in the morning itself but I got busy in other things. I understand how you feel and the emotions behind this post. Tight hugs to you. Any one would miss such lovely people. Rare as they are too!

  23. metherebel says:

    Just a heart felt tribute! I am sure they are great people since you talk of them with great respect even after 8 years after they are gone.

    Hugs to you RM 🙂

  24. pixie says:

    Big hugs sweetie! Such a heart-warming post…
    You got me all teary eyed..
    I’m quite sure both of them would have been very proud of you.

  25. Shital says:

    I am all teary eyed and i dont even know the Uncle and Aunty. This is a wonderful tribute to them RM

  26. Amit says:

    Loved this post! Beautifully written.

  27. Swarna says:

    Just read this. Remembered my neighbour aunties and uncles.
    Take are R’s mom. They will be really proud of you.

  28. techie2mom says:

    Hey, you are really lucky to have known such loving and caring people…
    I am going to ignore this line (“you were so daag to the Gujarati who is supposed to be the most kanjoos after a marwadi…”?!?!) just because you got me very emotional with this post…

  29. Pingback: Off for a Wedding – Blogathon Post 20 | R's Mom

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