Read part 1 here
and so this is how RD got his payback!
We got a circular from R’s school on Monday that she had to dress as a God/Goddess on Friday for fancy dress…abhi fancy dress and the R family are two parallel lines never intersecting!
RD and I had an argument that night on how I get hyper about stuff and I should stop taking so much tension..so much so, that I told him, you handle the fancy dress…
On Tuesday, after I had filled in my Tax returns, we discussed it again and he tells me..come on RM, help me out..lets discuss
RM: No, you handle it
RD: oh come on
RM: No nahi
R: yeh aap dono kyon fight kar rahe ho *Hands on hips and all that*
RM: Because I am not helping your appa on your fancy dress
R: Kyun amma?
RD: yes yes..kyun?
RM: You handle it
RD: arey come on RM, you know I cant do it alone..
RM: yes you can
RD: Arey, I did your taxes na…come now help me with this
and this is called hitting below the belt ..right at the spot where you know the person on the other side just cant refuse you..
Which means that mulakutal is not important…this is! (See Smita bribing is in the family!)
So we worked on the fancy dress…(honestly..God and Goddess – kya theme hai boss 😦 )
RMM had an excellent idea..she says..if you guys are so worried, dont send her to school..and this my darlings comes from a TEACHER! what is the world coming to 🙂
so on wednesday evening we go to the ONLY and nearest dress hire shop…
RM: nana chokaro mate kai bhagwan nu madshe (anything for small kids in form of God/goddess)
Bhai: hahaha XYZ school na cho (you are from XYZ school)
RM is a bit confused till we see….
….there is a huge pile of (I am kidding not!) 80 dresses which are packed and labelled for HIRE! I mean so many parents already had the bright idea of hiring..didnt I mention the R family is a bit slow..but itna slow!
And after talking to that guy, we realise the only costume available is of devi (Which devi dont ask!)
Even Devi would have been upset with that costume (bright eye hurting green, with a rani colour duppatta and fake gold jewellery..tacky eh?)..but remember beggars are no choosers..
RM: Bhai, beju kai costume che? (Any other costume)
Bhai: yes yes and proceeds to take out one which is an even brighter greener shade with jhintak chamkis on it..I almost faint
RM: beja koi bhagwan (any other God)
Bhai: no badha book thai gaya che (no, all of them are booked!)
So I look at RD and he shrugs and says do what you want..
THis is called apne pairo pe kulhadi marna (Hitting your own leg with your spade..its a hindi proverb Sugar and Spice )
my eyes gleam but brains tell me dont do it..
But RM is RM and RD is wed to her for life…(well at least thats what we believe)
So I say..okie with a very sad face lets pay the advance..
We pay 100 Rs advance and agree to collect the costume the next day
As we walk out
RM: RD that costume
RD: Come on RM, we dont have a choice…..
in the mean time, I have spoken to my parents
RMM apparently thinks very highly of her daughter…
Suggestion 1 of not sending her to school is rejected
so see what she comes up with
RM, whats the point of breaking your head, in an area were we lack are not really talented, do you want to do this..just make her Radha..make her wear a pavadai blouse (appa got a new one for her na! what incentive eh) and then put some flowers in her hair (where is there so much hair amma) and then put some jewellery (which I dont have!) and then she is ready
I love my mother..did I tell you that..she is the most practical female on earth..no seriously!
Then we bounce off ideas with appa suggesting stuff from Shiva to how to make that snake to what not..
anyways, while we chat, I say Gautam buddha…you know he is a God..and why stick to Hinduism..
Ma is like..well good idea
and so coming back to the evening of booking the ‘Devi’ costume..
I tell RD: how about Buddha…
We are still on the bribe thing right? so I have to give my best…unfortunately RD is unaware of my plans…
so he goes..okie
and then I make him take out the saffron towels he uses when he goes to Malai (chalo malai jane ka some advantage! This is advantage #1)
We try and wrap it around R and this is how it looks like 🙂
In the meantime R is insistent that she wants to be either Ganesh umachi or Shiva umachi…I keep telling her its not possible babes…no costumes..and then I am no Shruti right? to make it on my own…
so anyways we try to make her learn ‘Buddham sharanam Gachami’ and she is not ready to do it..
after that I show the above picture to one of my friends in office who asks me to make the dhoti longer and then ma says Buddha is identified with his hair and long ear..when we used to earlier, not have so much technology, we used just particular physical traits to identify a person..so Buddha was identified with the hair and the long ears..may be you can make them on cardboard! See this mother of mine
…so on Thursday night..
Bribe being bribe..RM works to her artistic best (which is not even artistic!)
but we decide to chuck the ‘Devi’ costume and stick to Buddha
I cut the hair on the cardboard and R and I colour it and then RD is like its looking good (I thought it looked more like a crown) but like ma says its all about depiction..
then I cut out long ears and put it on..but R is not very comfortable about it right from the start…
anyways having done that..and pleading with R to say ‘Buddham sharam gachami’ she still refuses to say it saying about 100 different versions of it..if God Buddha comes down from heaven, he will have a good laugh 🙂
Next day morning, RD says chalo I will go to work after dropping you guys to the busstop..oh Did I mention that the school was like normal school…you had to take your bag and all that and get into the bus..
I wonder why? because the others who would have hired costumes. I wonder what the kids would have done.
anyways so I put her tights, wrap the towel around her like a veshti while RD ties a belt around it so that it doesnt fall (malai jane ka advantage #2..he knows what will hold a veshti!) , we put a banian for her and then put the other veshti around her upper body which I change like a million times..
I try putting eye liner for her, but bad idea because her whole face is black! she rubbed her eyes…I just wash off everything…
We put the ears and the hair gear…
She is okie with the hair gear but the ears are hurting so RD says chuck it..
and so its Buddha with chotu ears
Then something RD said which made me pause in the total hyper state I was
RD said ‘RM, look we are giving our depiction of Buddha..no one has seen him..and no one knows what he really looks like..we believe that the Buddha ‘We believe in’ looks like this…we are not doing anything wrong..but we cant get the same we you see on the net..so let it be’
and after those words, I just let it be….
RD clicked a few pics leaving you with those…
and so this is how RM had to payback for formfilling that RD did for her..
Balanced couple eh?