Weekend Lesson Learnt – When Problems Come, They Have a Silver Lining to Them or This Blog is a Rant Column


or the second weekend when RD and RM didnt fight!
Waring: Long long post ahead
And so it was a horrid horrid weekend
1. We had a terribly sad accident Silver lining – no one was hurt
2. We had a bad experience at the police station Silver lining – we got the FIR done
3. I had a major argument with a man who was older to my father perhaps Silver lining – I didnt hit him! and our work in that office got done
4. R had severe ear ache and horrid vomit of cough Silver lining – we could go to the doctor immediately despite a waiting line no one objected to us rushing in..people are good
5. FIL left no silver lining to this


1. Friday night we had dinner out and R and I were almost half asleep on the back seat of the car…RD mentioned about a biker going with his girlfriend on the lonely road of ours at 100 kmph and then takes a turn towards the left to enter our building at abou 5 kmph just outside the gate..when boom I hear a noise and I wake up all shaken..
I hear RD say something about a mother and I thought we hit someone’s mother..and then I saw people rushing to our car and I thought we killed a dog…
Who the hell did you kill I ask RD
when one guy running towards the car says aapke husband ki galti nahi hai..and shows me that biker and his girlfriend getting up..
that damn stupid idiotic biker tried to overtake us from the left despite RD’s honking to our watchman to open the gate AND showing the indicator…can you believe that??
RD got off the car a bit dazed and that biker just ran away..yes he just picked his bike, put his girlfriend at the back and just went away..this happened in a span of about 20 secs before RD and FIL could get off the car…the crowd gathered around us gave us the number of the bike..
a police patrol jeep came (they always arrive AFTER the accident scene is cleared) and told us to go to the police station to file a complaint
We went at about 9.45 in the night…

2. Both RD and I walked in with R on my hips..who by the way had gotten up and got a bit shaken with the accident…FIL was behind me…we both started explaining to the inspector what happened when he rudely asked me in marathi who was driving…RD said I was..
he tells me’ toh tumi gaapa basa ani bahar basa (Then you shut up and go out and sit)
I was dumbstuck..RD just looked at me and anokhen hi anokhen mein asked me to go out…I didnt react..just went out and FIL told me to calm down…We waited for about 1.5 Freaking hours to get that damn FIR done..yes 1.5 hours to note down is what they took
R was cranky forget R..even I was cranky..R refused to go home without RD because she thought the police would take him into the jail..yes that poor baby was terrified…
and honestly there was NO one else there..only us and one more lady to complain..they could have done our work in no time..but nahi…they just prolonged the process as much as they could.
I have actually lost faith in the judiciary system in India..if this is the way things work, no wonder people dont want to involve the police in anything…they are behaving as if they are doing us a favor…bloody isnt it then God Damn Duty to help us!!!
I never never use foul language especially not in this blog..but you can well imagine my frustration level..
RD on the other hand was this picture of sheer calm..and I dont know how..its ALWAYS the other way round…he politely answered Qs…FIL was a bit reluctant to leave him as well and go so we just stuck around…R was at her cranky best and I dont blame her okie!!!
3. and then we reached home and slept..just crashed on the bed…next day morning RD and FIL went to the police station again! to get a copy of the FIR…after just waiting for 45 minutes they got it…I dont know whats the big deal about making people wait! lets not get into that..
We dropped R to the daycare and FIL near our house and RD and I went to that electricity change office again…and then I got in…there was a line..I was standing..
This old man comes and stands next to me..I tell him very very politely ‘uncle, hum line mein khade hain’ (Uncle we are standing in the line)
Uncle: so what can I do? I came before you…I saw you and that man get off the car…I walked in before you…and look at you..age ka kuch lihaaz nahi hai…(no respect for age)
and then snapped his finger as you would shoo away a street mongrel or something
Thats it..something snapped inside me big time
I told him uncle firstly I was being polite..secondly your age doesnt really show you are mature…I just told you we are in the line..if you have a problem..tell it politely dont accuse me of not showing respect…
RD was stunned I am sure…I am not the types who fights in public..especially not to someone who is equal to my dad’s age…
RD told me to just let that guy go ahead…I was like no why should I? I didnt see him before me..he cant accuse me like this..the whole office was staring at me..
RD just calmly told me its okie RM, you are not in a hurry are you?
RD told that uncle, that my wife just told you she was in the line thats all..why do you talk about lihaaz and all that…
And that uncle started again..which again snapped me and I told him that please dont accuse us of things we have not done..RD just pulled me towards him and asked me to keep quiet..
I shut up realising that I was just being stupid..or was I?
I let him go ahead of me..only because he was much much older to me and my parents have taught me that always always always respect your elders!I just had a bad day
4. In the evening, we picked up R and then went to meet FIL’s cousin who lives near by…R was happily playing around and when we started to return home she said ‘amma, ear ache ho raha hai’
I told RD to rush to the doctor..he was like arey nahi she is just playing around..but after 5 minutes is very bad traffic..I realised that it was definitely paining badly..
I called up the doc and he said he was there…RD tried his best to move the car as fast as possible but the traffic was killing…FIL got off near our house and R was howling like crazy with pain saying ‘amma bahut dukh raha hai’
We rushed in to the doc and as usual there were at least 20 patients sitting there..but R was in so much pain that I just rushed in without even looking at anyone..people looked bugged but I guess bottom line they realised that it was an emergency
The doc looked at R, prescribed an ear drop for her and told me it was due to severe severe cold!
She came out howling while RD went to get the ear drop..finally she got some relief when the ear drop was put and I apologised to everyone there for rushing in despite their turn..they all turned out to be so sweet and said dont worry we can understand the emergency!
R vomited one ton and half of cough on the way back home…by the time we reached home, R, RM , car seat and everything around us was full of coughed vomit 😦
we reached home and R just went off the sleep while RD made hot dosas to perk up my mood 🙂
5. Sunday morning – FIL left back for Calcutta and life in general is pathetic :(:(
On a positive note, R and I spent some quality time together reading, painting, dancing, chopping veggies for the week and making some green chilly achar.. :):)
So there..everything as a silver lining…

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About R's Mom

Not-so-new-mom
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19 Responses to Weekend Lesson Learnt – When Problems Come, They Have a Silver Lining to Them or This Blog is a Rant Column

  1. Anonymous says:

    Oh Rm,so sorry to hear such sad incidents happened to you.Hugs dear,hope it nake u feel better.Aahh and abt indian police and indian govt. lesser we talk the better.I know a case here in bangalore when a girl wanted to file a FIR as her handbag (which contained her official paper,id card ,income tax paper,lisence and even a pendrive with all her personal pictures) was snatched in kormangala at 4:00 PM (its posh area and never isolated) by two guys on a bike.She went to police station to lodge a complain where in she got such bad looks from the policemen there that she got so scared and left the place without lodgging the complain.Next day she called up my friend (our mutual friend) to accompany her to the said police station.Guess what the policemen there failed(pretend) to understand english and hence refused to file a case.After lot of swearing /cursing words being exchanged the policeman agreed to file a case but not an FIR.Somehow they succeeded in filing the FIR but police refused to take down the Bike registartion number which the girl has noted down while her bag was being snacthed.Later they came to know that the guys on bike were well known by the policemen and have earlier too have created issues for others and police take no action against them.And all said I have now come to believe that there is something seriously wrong with indian govt,law and police and we have even crossed the heights of corruption~ Garima

  2. R's Mom says:

    @Garima: thanks darling :)I dont believe that actually happened! how could they NOT understand english…what nonsense yaar!

  3. R's Mom, So sorry to hear about R's ear/cold. Make sure you keep track of infected tonsils etc. My daughter recently had a similar experience, and although she is 22 years older than R, she told me the pain was too much. Giving antibiotics for the throat problem (throat connected to ear via eustachian tube) cleared the stuff up. Apparently this kind of thing is rampant in Mumbai right now. And nothing about the police is surprising. I thought you got the FIR thing done comparatively fast. :-)And dont get me started on queues. It will be another blogpost ….:-))

  4. Many hugs.. Hope R is feeling better know and the coming week ends are pleasant …I too faced the same kind of incident with these police men few years back. They made us wait and wait and wait and made us come back. It took almost 4 days to get a FIR for the loss of my wallet. Thats when I seriously prayed God not to make me step into police station again. I pray the same for you now 🙂

  5. Smita says:

    There indeed is a sliver lining everywhere. But ya the 1st 2 incidents were blood curling!!The police is pathetic, they just know how to harass common people and less said about that couple the better. Police is in a way encouraging honest ppl like us to not to come forward in future.That uncle sounds horrible. I guess these ppl get mis treated by their own kids at home and come & take out their anger here. They don't understand that respect comes out naturally it shouldn't be demanded. Hows R today? Gone to school??*Hugs* RM I am sure things will be positive from today 🙂

  6. RS says:

    Hey RM! Hope your mood is much better today – weekend is OVER and so are all the troubles – so cheer up! This police and their nonchalance is so irritating – couldnt they even see that you were with a child and it was already late night? Che! Sorry state of affairs…I know exactly how an ear ache will be – the car,me and vomit incident that too on the way to the hospital is still very fresh in memory! 😦 And the silver lining – everyone let me go straight to the doctor – i was smelling so bad!! :-PThe poor kid must've been in a LOT of pain – howz she doing now? Gone to school?

  7. starry eyed says:

    (((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))First of all, what IDIOT police. My blood would've boiled too, if they spoke like that to people who have been victimised by a crime. Secondly, that older guy was just B*LLSH%T….I hate when people play the age or gender card to get ahead. And you look like the bad guy. Glad R is ok now. Now, will you all please have some nice BORING weekends where you fight and you blog about those sweet nothings?!

  8. R's Mom says:

    @Suranga-ji: Hope your daughter is better…I actually laughed at what you wrote, though she is 22 years older to R…isnt that cute..and a mom is a mom is a mom na :)WHAT! 1.5 hours and then you think its fast *stractching my head*And when is that blogpost coming up?@onarollercoasterride: Long time no see…hope all is fine with youFOUR DAYS!! and you actually went back..I would have just just just left it seriously!hugs hugs hugs@Smita: seriously rey..I will think a million times before going to the police! That uncle 😦 now I am feeling foolish for arguing with him, but that instant I just lost it when he said no respect and all yaar :(R is better…yes yes gone to school otherwise the school will get locked na ;)@RS: yes yes totally cheered up..arey writing this post only made me so much better 🙂 oh dear! chutku went through the same is it..LOL on the stink = easy access to doc :)gone to school and back to chewing my head :)@Starry: thanks thanks thanks for the huge hugs :)arey that older guy really was crazy…I mean I was just stating that I was in a line..you know starry, RD told me the same thing…it irritates him when people talk about age or gender and use it to twist other people's arms and then make you feel guilty about it! yes..next weekend update will be definitely full of fights and nothings..Awww..I so loved that last line of yours 🙂

  9. It indeed was an awful weekend for you, RM. **A Big Hug**Any office, even remotely connected with the Government, be it Police, RTO, EB, BSNL – none of them are consumer friendly. Don't really know whom they are operating for! 😦 As for people jumping queues, I wonder if they get some 'real happiness' on making some one else wait at their cost! And using age as an excuse, I have nothing to say about it.With R being alright now, waiting for the usual 'feel-good' posts from you. 🙂

  10. R's Mom says:

    @Sugar and Spice: Awww! thanks dear…planning to do some feel good posts soon…bahut ranting ho gaya na…thoda zyada ho gaya hai 🙂

  11. Bikramjit says:

    OH MY GOD . and thats a INSPECTOR of police.. HOW DARE HE SAY that to you.. If it was here he would be thrown out of the job IMMEDIATELY even if he is son of a prime minister .. No wonder these stupid police wallas never catch the culprit ever and only can shout at genuine people .. HOW come no one takes a WALK over such thing or protests.. a Cop says something in canada and the whole of india wants to do a walk .. I would have slapped that idiot policeman.. I cant beleive this … You take care and Dont worry let me come , us police walle ko ghar bula ke PITAI karenge .. chinta not .. and then the old man OH GREAT its gets better and better STUPID MAN I hate him toooo Bikram's

  12. noon says:

    My God – I can feel your pain. It must have been so scary to wake up and see a crowd rushing to your car. I have had a similar incident – but while I was taking KB for a walk on the stroller (he was less than one) buckled in his car seat in the strlr – this woman was waiting outside her apt behind the stop sign to get into the road – I waited to make sure she was waiting – since there was a car behind her I had to walk in front of her – there were cars coming – so I knew she had to wait – the moment I stepped foot she only had looked to her left and hit the gas – hit our stroller – even at that starting speed – the stroller was thrown out and I fell in the middle of the road. Really really scary incident – miracle we were saved. Knock on wood. What a bloody moron this cyclist. He could have gotten hurt. And for now fault of yours you had to go through all this ridiculous waste of time and mental energy. Man, thank God at least no one got hurt. Reading about who the police reacted leaves me completely stunned. Hope R is feeling better now. Nice that people were understanding about having to rush in…

  13. Hope R is better now!!! I tell u as Starry said please get back to your boring weekends. How do u all manage to pack so much in one weekend..>Amazing 🙂

  14. weourlife says:

    Big hugs RM, I hope you all are doing fine by now. These Bikers are crazy and how can he run, there is no courtesy? Police, I had high regard for Mumbai Police, now looks like that's not the case. Blore I had tough time dealing with Police when I lost my purse. Don't worry just forget the weekend and lets look forward for a great week ahead ..Cheer up and Smile 🙂

  15. Dil se says:

    You have one hell of an eventful and busy life, I can see that. I often crib about my busy weekends on everysunday night, thinking where did all the time fly away.I hope R feels better from her ear ache.I feel sorry for your woes at the police station and then at the rudeness of the "not-so" elderly guy at the line.These are some of the things I do not miss about India.Everything else, including making green chillies achar, I definitely do 🙂

  16. Comfy says:

    Oh RM! That was not a good weekend at all. So so sorry and big big hugs.The idiotic guy on the bike. Someone should take away his bike I say.The police..grr I don't even know what their problem is other than they being on a power trip at the expense of us common people. Look at them turn to a mouse when people with connection show up.That elder uncle..where did he come off? Respect needs to be earned not demanded and if that is how he behaves, no wonder he gets none.Poor poor R. Hope she is doing a lot better now. Hugs to her.Moral of the story – You and RM have a fight on the weekend so that it goes well. 😀

  17. R's Mom says:

    @Bikram: you are such a sweetheart :)heheheh 🙂 I loved the pitai part of the comment..but nahi rey..its just that after a while you just give up…which has what has happened to me..I have given up on the Mumbai police seriously!@Noon: Oh my God! thats the scariest thing ever…I mean imagine doing that!!! What a horrid horrid horrid lady!!! Touch wood and all..and big time hugs..sorry this post reminded you of that stupid incident!@Nuttie: I wonder seriously how I manage to pack so much in a weekend..or is it that I make a big issue about stuff…hehehe 🙂 this weekend..definitely back to fighting@LF: and can I ask you why you had high regard for the Mumbai police..honestly rey..I toh have given up hope..I dont know how they manage not to take care of the blasts, ensure safety or anything…I can understand the work pressure with so many millions of people in Mumbai, but what bugged me was their non caring attitude…@Dilse: thanks dear 🙂 no you shouldnt miss India for the police or the 'elderly' but green chilly achar..yes yes..want me to pack some for you ;)@Comfy : yes moral learnt the hard way..definitely fighting with RD this weekend :):)Respect needs to be earned not demanded – isnt that a wonderful line..I am going to try this next time 😉

  18. Kanchan says:

    Hugs RM and take care of R. She is too young and I can only imagine the shock ! Adi and his dad were in a major accident a couple of months ago. He is still not comfortable in a car, has become a back seat driver now.And the police ! What a shame. They have become numb to human suffering…Hubby is a lawyer and it took him 4 hours in the nite to lodge an FIR and 3 days to get a copy, not to mention the greasing of hands required. I lost my faith in the judicial system since I got an inside view of it thr' hubby !Hope R is coping well now…the police station must've been too much. Take care and yes..a little less action on weekends please :)PS: I had to laugh at "Who the hell did you kill". Only a wife can say that to a hubby, no?

  19. R's Mom says:

    @Kanchan: thanks dear…much better now :):) yaa that only a wife can tell her husband hehehe 🙂

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